Monday, December 10, 2007

To Lisa- Tiny Tuppence aka Morticia the Peg Leg

Here's the second message that was sent to my blog, this one is from Lisa, my Sharon's friend.

HiYa Big Bollocks
Only me (Lisa)

Just a quickie --- to say look after my
little friend cause if you don't you will need more than the US army to protect you. You have got yourself a dirty bitch there! SO make sure you have been exercising because you are going to need the energy. As she is doing my head in talking about nipple clamps all th' time.

Good luck for everything you do as long as it is with Sharon - see ya later potata.

Raunchy and baudy, yes, Sharon can be, but there is so much more to her that I'll show you here on this blog below. Like I said in the post to Ian, I will look after Sharon, don't you worry! I know that you love Sharon as a sister and you're concerned, but let me tell you, I love her with all my heart and is the most precious thing to me. As far as the nipple clamps, I can't do nothing for you as YOU are the one who got her onto that subject! LOL!
As far as friends go, I do thank you for being there for her and being someone that she could share things with. You are one in a million and because you've given her so much happiness, I can only thank you from the bottom of my heart for being someone who she could depend on, share things with, and provided her true friendship.
Over the past year and a half this has been like a journey for me. From absolute misery to paradise. Sharon has been the greatest EVERYTHING to me. Not only is she my perfection, she's so very....
Loving with pride in her Dad (and all others whom she loves)....

Beautiful in Texas...

Hilarious in London...

Sexy before going to the Bongo in Middlesbrough....

Stunning even in her kitchen...

Just look at her, isn't she blinding in her brilliance?!
Aaaaah the essence of my Sharon!
Not to mention, refined, intelligent, strong, romantic, maternal, classy, fabulous, feminine, ect. ect. I could go on and on! She is the yin to my yang, my absolute compliment in every way. Where I may be a bit rough and crude, she offers the refinement that is necessary to temper all of that in me. Never have I met a lady, other than my mother, who completely defines what a woman is. She is what I have always wanted and never had. You know, someone who is really special and only comes once in a life time. So, Lisa, you don't have to worry, because where Sharon takes good care of me, you can bet your bottom dollar, I will do the same for her! Isn't that what you do to the one who fits you like a glove?

To Ian. An apology of sorts...

My apologies to all of Sharon's friends in the UK, but no matter what you do, I have to take her away from you....

This post is in response to Sharon's boss Ian, who I am told is a very lovely man, whom I must thank for giving my Sharon a wonderful opportunity to find her talent in the work force. What Sharon has told me about Ian is that he's an outstanding employer who is caring and thoughtful to all of his employees. Then, not to mention, her friend Lisa whom I must say I must thank for giving my Sharon some really good ideas to bring over here with her. (Lisa you know what I mean!) And by the way, Lisa I WILL take very good care of her, as I have to. There's no other choice. She's my universe, my lover, my friend, my most wise counsel. For me to neglect in taking care of her would be like cutting out my right eye and my trigger finger. For a soldier, that's just something you don't do!

A wonderful work environment, now, that is something you don't hear much about these days, and I thank the Almighty for placing these two beautiful people in her path. But, in sheer desperation to keep her in England working for him, I have received the following message from Ian on this very blog. Here it is reproduced for your reading pleasure...

The Boss Here
This is just a joke Sharon and Lisa are only allowing me to be the boss for ten minutes - so I will have to be quick. Tell you more when Sharon goes to Starbucks god help us with the orgasms she'll have thinking about you. I am plotting ways to keep her here and the one that has the most votes is a letter to the US embassy saying that she is a member of a terrorist organisation plotting to blow up a house, but we cannot say the colour because in the UK we have to be politically correct.


Sharon's Boss and Friend

Nice touch Ian and very funny too! Who says I don't "get" English humor! I really understand how you feel because Sharon is truly wonderful isn't she? But, I have to explain why I can't cave in and let you and Lisa have your way.

The last 4 months and a couple of weeks, I've been busting my butt to prepare my home for Sharon's arrival. Even after spending a month in the most miserable place on earth, the National Training Center in Death Valley California, I continued my cleaning and repairing of my house, which I was awarded along with my children, in a settlement against my ex-wife. My ex-wife, realizing that everything was going to go my way, tried to turn the place into a wreck so I would drop the issue, but I didn't. It was a matter of principal and the well being of my children was at stake so, there you go.

Just in case you all want to know what this miserable training area looks like, well here it is above. NTC is hell on earth. Literally.

I would rather spend a year in Iraq, than a month in this place. It's hotter, dustier, and for some ungodly reason seems to be a place where on every rotation of units, someone ends up either dead or seriously injured. NTC is a realistic simulation of how we conduct our wartime mission. Now, while I may groan and moan about this place, I am thankful for it, as I and my cohorts receive top notch training, so that we can bring the pain upon our enemies around the world. Oh, and for those liberals out there, the "surge" of forces in Iraq IS working, which again is a testament to the training that we receive in "Hell on Earth".

Anyway, just so my Sharon knows, the "nest" that I'm preparing for her will be very comfortable and warm. As I've mentioned to her, the greatest gift other than love for her that I can give her is time. We wouldn't want her to come over here and feel that she has to put her cleaning hat on, and get busy. So, I have gone straight up domestic and here's a before and after picture to prove it.


And after...

This is only the living room, the entire house was in a state of total disarray, but I am never one to give up on anything, so Martha Stuart, I'm going to give you a run for the money!

I am almost complete with the overhaul, and by the time Sharon arrives, I will be done both inside of the house and on the outside. Just thought I'd share that with you, in case you were wondering.

Now, of course, I understand that Sharon will be missed, but I have promised her that every couple of years, we'll be going back to England to visit, so, what I suggest is that those of you who care for her, keep in contact with her. In addition, should you ever decide to go on holiday, you all are more than welcome to come over and visit us, in the great state of Texas. Our door is always open for you, and it would be a delight to have you. Besides, I can throw down in the kitchen and will be more than willing to serve up something delicious like my "world famous" chimichangas.....

Or if you are daring and can handle the complexity of flavors and spiciness that Ethiopian food has to offer, you can sample a plate of delicious delicacies from my home countries of Ethiopia and Eritrea. Many Ethiopian dishes are similar to curries you'd find in India as in ancient times India and Ethiopia traded ideas when it came to food. So, I know you all would find it quite appealing.

Absolutely delicious! I'm a "foody" type, I can't help it! LOL! See what you've done, now I'm getting hungry again!

For more information about Ethiopian restaurants and food go to this link here.

Well, the invitation has been given, and I only give it once, so as I like to say, Sharon's friends are my friends, and vice-versa!

Anyway though, just think, a macho, foul mouthed, bar room brawling type of a soldier, cleaning up and decorating like (I would say better than) a woman would? For Sharon not to come over and spend her life with me would definitely be bad form, as now my ego and my image are both on the line. So, there really is no choice now, is there?

I must close this now, as it is getting pretty long winded, I must say in the words of the immortal and greatest recording artist of all time, Michael Jackson...actually I have to leave you with this video, and you can get the words there...

Video Credit-
Photo Credit- Ethiopian food photo from Dukem Restaurant and